Before you can connect to her, you must find out more about her first. You can do this before even talking to her by looking at her physically and reading her body language.
Note things such as:
1) What she’s wearing.
2) How she walks/sits
3) And so on
It is generally a good idea to examine a woman physically first so you have at least a faint idea of what she’s like. if she looks artificial in every way with her heavy makeup, you know she may be cold but insecure deep inside.
Always note all the details so you can verify them when you talk to her later.
By talking to her
As you talk to her, try to get at least some of the following information from her:
1) What she likes and doesn’t like
2) What is her dream/ambition
3) What makes her happy or sad
4) What makes her scared / feel safe
5) What makes her feel good
6) Her childhood
As you talk with her, try to focus on her desires. Remember that human beings all have their own desires
Try to ask her to explain why she likes something...